ethics

In everyday life we are faced with difficult situations for which we are forced to make complicated decisions which lead to positive or negative outcomes. One situation that I was faced with was when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer.  I was only twenty at the time when my mom came home from her doctors appointment she sat my father, myself, and my siblings down and informed us that she had cancer.  At the time I was in shock, because I never thought that this could happen to someone in my family.  She expressed to us how she really needed our help because the next couple of months would be difficult because she would be out of work and she knew that my dad needed to work because bills in the house needed to be paid.  As we sat and discussed the situation she stated that she will have to have surgery and after the surgery she would have to have chemotherapy every other week and because my dad had to work she needed someone to take her.  My siblings and I agreed that we would take turns taking her to her appointments and at the time I thought it was a great idea, because my sister and I were both in college at the time and two of my brothers that were still home at the time didn't work.  I didn't realize until the time came for her to go to her appointments that I was up for a challenge. 

After my mom had her surgery she was sick and very weak she wasn't able to have her chemo because she had to go into the hospital three more times after the first surgery, because her cancer had spread.  After her third and final surgery the time had come for my dad to go back to work and me and my siblings had to step in and take care of her and also take her to her chemo appointments.  The first week I took her I dropped her off and went to school because I had a eight o'clock class.  Once my class was over I went back to pick her up the doctor advised me to make sure she eats and that she gets plenty of rest.  That day I only went to one class so I had already missed a day from my other two classes.  I spoke with my instructors to let them know what was going on and the understood.  The next appointment came and my brother was supposed to take her but he told her to tell me to take her because he was tired, I did and of course I missed class once again.  Then the third time came and the same thing happened again I finally realized that I didn't have any help and that if I wanted my mom around I was gonna have to step up and do this on my own that meant taking her to her doctors appointments and chemo appointments and making sure she ate and got rest after having chemo.  There was only one problem I was a full-time student in school and what did this mean for me. I had already missed some classes, because I was at her appointments. That day I made the hardest decision of my life and that was to quit school.  At the time I thought that quitting school would be beneficial because I could help bring my mom back to good health and that I would be helping my dad because he wouldn't have to be out of work so much.  I didn't realize that the decision I made was going to be so difficult.  One source of ethical standards is making decisions.  Velasquez states "making good ethical decisions requires a trained sensitivity to ethical issues and a practiced method for exploring the ethical aspects of a decision and weighing the considerations that should impact our choice of a course of action" (Velasquez et al p. 277).  He also states "the more novel and difficult the ethical choice we face, the more we need to rely on discussion and dialogue with others about the dilemma" (Velasquez et al p. 277).

According to Kohlberg's six stages of moral development he explains in stage one of level one moral development obedience and punishment orientation" Kohlberg's stage 1 to piaget's first stage of moral thought.  The child assumes that powerful authorities hand down a fixed set of rules which he or she must unquestioningly obey." (Crain 9. 284).  In this situation I was being obedient to my parents because I was doing something that they wanted me to do and as their daughter I felt it was right and that it was my responsibility.  Even though I was being obedient I felt like I was being punished because I had to do the one thing I didn't want to do and that was quit school.  As time my mom was getting better and the most difficult decision I made turned out to not be so bad because once she got better I was able to go back to school.  My mom and dad also brought me a new car for all my hard work so the more I think about the decision I made wasn't as bad as I thought it was my mom is happy healthy and a 13 year cancer survivor.